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About Varied / Hobbyist Kevin KMale/United States Group :iconburninggates: BurningGates
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Deviant for 10 Years
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Kevin K
Artist | Hobbyist | Varied
United States
Current Residence: Missouri
Favourite genre of music: Anything that makes you feel good
Favourite photographer: Me? X-D
Favourite style of art: If it makes me happy, it's my favorite
Operating System: XP
MP3 player of choice: VLC
Shell of choice: Tree Bark
Wallpaper of choice: The last awesome picture I saw
Skin of choice: The one I was born with :-P
Favourite cartoon character: Haruhara Haruko
Personal Quote: Don't try to simulate reality, try to surpass it
I seem to have died artistically... As most isolated introverts do, I've spent a lot of time analyzing the situation.

I've become consumed by this feeling that I have to create something legendary for my art to be worth doing. I have to make a graphic novel, or I have to make a comic series, or I have to make money. I have to have a lot of fans, I have to be critically acclaimed, I have to stand out with a completely unique style, I have to be the fucking best at what I do. If any one of those factors isn't met, I'm a failure.

Art has become a source of stress and anxiety to me. What used to be a fun way to express myself has evolved into a desperate struggle to impress people. What used to make me feel proud of myself now makes me feel ashamed and frustrated.

Somehow, I'm going to have to wipe out all this corrupted thinking and start over. No making epic novels, no big money, no impressing people. I need to re-discover the joy of expressing myself without worrying about what happens afterward.

That's the thing... I'm not really expressing myself anymore. I'm thinking "oh shit, what if people take this serious masterpiece as a joke?" or "fuck, this has no originality at all", or "nobody's ever gonna pay money to look at this weird shit". I'm just sitting there worrying and stressing about the future and missing out on all the good stuff I can do right here in the moment.

I don't know what will become of my future as an artist, but I'm not gonna do this to myself anymore. There will be no more epic ambitions or impossible goals. If I do get back into art, my only goal will be to intentionally *not* impress anyone. Maybe I'll entertain people, or annoy people, or just have a good time wasting a piece of paper, but I won't do it in an impressive fashion. No more expectations ruining my favorite pastime.
  • Mood: Distressed
  • Listening to: Lindsey Sterling - Beyond the Veil
  • Reading: Nothing
  • Watching: Shaolin Soccer
  • Playing: Pokemon Pearl
  • Eating: Beef stew mixed with ramen
  • Drinking: Soymilk

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TsaoShin Featured By Owner Nov 12, 2014  Professional Digital Artist
Happy birthday, Lava!
LavaLizard Featured By Owner Nov 12, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks Tsao :)
shaunC Featured By Owner Nov 12, 2014   General Artist
LavaLizard Featured By Owner Nov 12, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks :D
Art-Has-Soul Featured By Owner Mar 2, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you for joining ArtHasSoul We are very happy to have you within our community. We are here to feature and promote as much art as possible, as you can see from our home page. Our group is all about artists and their amazing work. 

We do hold weekly AOTW "Art Of The Week" Contests, as well a Monthly Theme Challenge!

Please feel free to browse our galleries and submit your works. You may submit up to 2 works of art per day! We have a vast gallery with a wide variety of folders to accommodate artists with multiple talents!

Again thank you for joining our wonderful group! We're thrilled to have you AND your art!

Cecaangyal Featured By Owner Dec 31, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Many thanks for the watch! =)
artbypaulfisher Featured By Owner Dec 8, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you very much for the favourite :)
LavaLizard Featured By Owner Dec 8, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
No problem :-)
Soreiya Featured By Owner Nov 12, 2013
Happy birthday! Hope you managed to enjoy yourself.
LavaLizard Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thanks :)
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